Sued51's Blog











{October 15, 2013}   We All Need a Hug Sometimes: Embracing Sadness

hug couponI have known people who, when they feel depressed, reach for the sad movie or the sad song. Until recently, I have to say I didn’t really understand it. Didn’t it make you feel worse??? I wanted to ask, “Don’t you think you should be watching something uplifting to make you feel better?” I chocked it up to perhaps there being something wrong with me…a lack of a capacity to feel deeply??

But light has dawned on marble rock, as I have been known to say. I finally did it myself and understood it.

I had been feeling down and discouraged lately; almost afraid to socialize for fear that the smallest, most trivial encounter might reduce me to tears. I felt ASHAMED at my state, at my self-pity. Watching something about someone inspiring only made me feel guilty and MORE ASHAMED: I am NOT Malala. I felt fresh out of courage, devoid of strength, a sorry excuse for a human being. YIKES! I had to do something to dig myself out of that place.

And so I went to “ON DEMAND” and chose last week’s episode of “Glee,” the tribute to Cory Monteith aka “Finn.” I could embrace the sadness; the tears came (in my mind) for a young life ended too soon in more ways than one: the actor AND his character.

Who wouldn’t cry?? Are these tears of self-pity?? No…they are natural, legitimate tears (I can tell myself)…and I can get rid of them. Guilt-free tears…a novel concept for me.

Hmmm…I guess sometimes when you need a hug and there’s no one around, hugging sadness will do.

Advertisements


So true! That is exact how I feel when I’m sad and self-pitieing.

Like



Can’t pretend any of it’s easy, but you made me want to reach out and hug you too 🙂

Like



sued51 says:

Thanks, Jo. A virtual hug works too! 🙂

Like



Livonne says:

sometimes we just need a cry as it clears the cobwebs out of our brain.. My sad movies are the notebook and steel magnolias.. Guaranteed to make me have a good cry..

Like



sued51 says:

Yes…the Notebook is definitely cry-worthy! Sad music works also…there are certain songs that set me off no matter how often I hear them…

Like



Hugging sadness never works…Trust me ! Well you can get a free hug from me anytime 🙂 I cry whil watching most of the series and Movies…. So I can’t pick up the sad ones for myself 🙂

Like



sued51 says:

Thanks for your comment, White Pearl. Thank you for the offer of a hug and the follow! 🙂

Like



My Pleasure 🙂

Like



Hugs to you! That was a really great episode of Glee and I also felt it was uplifting. Your site was recommended to me by Noeleen who I feel writes about sorrow, sadness, devastation, brilliantly. Glad she sent me over here. Hope you have a good Thanksgiving. Paulette

Like



sued51 says:

Paulette,
Noeleen sent me to you too! 🙂 I think she is quite talented.
Thanks for your comment and visit.:-)

Like



Nice writing. Hugs to you! After a death in my immediate family, I held my feelings captive for fear of seeming emotionally weak. Later I watched a tear-jerker of a movie and let all those feelings out. I knew I was crying for more than the movie; I was crying for the words unsaid, the hugs unhugged, and the tears unshed, and the pain unshared. Grieving is hard, and after awhile, people think you are okay and over it, but you are not….not for a long time. Thanks for the free hug coupon!

Like



Giovanni says:

I feel better able to grieve when I can listen to a sad song.

Like



sued51 says:

Yes, that can work too.

Like



[…] Another tool is to read uplifting materials…and yet sometimes the opposite helps: singing the “blues” as the title says. I listen to sad music, cry and get it out of my system. A couple of songs that are guaranteed to make me cry: “Sparrow” by Simon & Garfunkel or Lyle Lovett singing “Texas Trilogy.” (Below is the original version…couldn’t find a YouTube video of Lyle Lovett performing it. The last song in the trilogy, Bosque County Romance, is the one that sets me off.) A sad movie can do the trick as well. […]

Like



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

et cetera
%d bloggers like this: