Pondering What Occupancy Means…

Because “Occupy” seems to be “Le Mot du Jour,” I started thinking about its connotations for me. I wondered who came up with the term, “Occupy Wall Street” and why?

My first thought was that it didn’t fit. It seems like a passive word, and I don’t think of the protesters as passive. They are taking the time, energy, and action to make a point. They are out there while the rest of us are going about our lives, secretly cheering for them.

For me, there’s also a lack of connectedness, a lack of dimension to the word. No emotion. When you occupy a place, you’re just in that space in that time. You are just “there” in some surface way. There’s no nesting, no living, no home.

Hmm…then again, maybe it does work. With all the people losing their homes it is fitting that they learn to only “occupy” them as buildings, as simply a place in time, a roof over their heads. And they wonder why people trash the buildings when they leave. If someone can take it away, it is folly to become attached.

PS…I Think I Changed my Mind…

As soon as I wrote my “last” post on this blog and started working on the new one, I panicked.  Not everything I want to write fits my new format, which I intend to be photos, poems, and thought/fragments. I still want to write essays/stories every once in a while.  Everything can’t be made into a poem (or maybe it can?).

For example, the other day my mother told me she was reading old letters my father had written to her at least 50 years ago. There were “lost” stories she was telling me about — when my older brother walked into a mailbox on Halloween and cut his hand, and a neighbor had to clean him up — and it made me think about the fact that when generations beyond mine come to the end of their lives they likely won’t have such things to help them relive their lives; no one writes letters anymore.  Unless you are someone who prints and saves emails those “point in time” stories are gone forever.

I write to commit my stories and my life to words.  Many of the stories are already gone because I didn’t do this earlier; you think you won’t forget, but you do. Your mind is constantly evaluating what is important and what is not. That’s what I think is so wonderful about my mother’s letters; they represent what my mother and father thought was important and newsworthy at that moment in their lives.

So…I may keep plugging with some stories here, though most likely not on any type of schedule.

When you are reading “Last Train to Qville”, slip over and check this blog, I might just have felt inspired.

2011 in review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 1,700 times in 2011. If it were a cable car, it would take about 28 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

The Nature of Change

Nothing can stay the same (I know this is a cliché and I am stating the obvious…but it IS true); inevitably it will at some point become obsolete, disintegrate, or die. Change is an essential part of life, a necessary risk that produces something lesser or something better, but not THE SAME.

I’m the type of person who likes boundaries and rules (which is why I am a better editor than writer), consequently I don’t really embrace change. I tend to be doggedly attached to people and places; I don’t enjoy moving on and making new friends.  I do like to VISIT new places, but I always want to go home.  But I am digressing to psychological analysis (I know digressing is not effective writing– for nonfiction anyway).

Those characteristics and traits carry over to the online world. I have been subscribed to blogs that at first seemed informative, enjoyable, and well-written and then they changed; they became shilling sites for the blogger’s webinars and e-books. I understand why: the authors needed to make money or create a brand and market themselves to move forward in their chosen field. Despite my acknowledgment of the inevitability of change, the blog transformation disappoints me and I unsubscribe.

I have now reached the inevitable (gasp) “change” point with this blog. I thought I would find a subject on which I could claim myself an “expert” or find one “passion”, but I didn’t. I am in a transition period in my life, what is generally called “middle age” (though my theory is that when you don’t have children your life is divided in half…not thirds, thus there is no “middle age”, but again, I digress…). Although I feel like I still have more to say, it will not be here with THIS blog. I appreciate those of you who have subscribed and been loyal readers for the past 2 years; thank you for your comments and for choosing to spend some time with me.

Here’s the good news (I hope): I am creating a totally new blog for 2012 entitled, Last Train to QVille. It is still under construction. I’ll let you know when I have it up and running.  Happy New Year!

Susan

A Lovely Christmas Gift

Just before Christmas I received a package in the mail that I wasn’t expecting: it was my copy of The Binnacle with my published poem!  What a special Christmas present for me!

I loved the presentation; it came in a little box. Each poem chosen in the competition was on a card (business-card size) with the author’s bio on one side and their poem/prose on the other. At the bottom of the box I found 9 cards of my own poem (including the one which appeared intermingled with the other work). The box is perfect for me to put on a little table and, every once in a while, pull out a poem to read.  I just may have to enter again in 2012!

Remembrance

The one-year anniversary of my father’s death is fast approaching.  Everyone I’ve met who has ever lost a loved one has warned me this is a difficult time.  I want to do something, but nothing feels good enough.

My father’s gravesite marker is flat to the ground. We are not allowed to plant anything around it, and although his marker is accompanied by a vase, there are only so many fake flowers we can put in it. My mother bought a “remembrance blanket”; she pictured a blanket of greens with white flowers interspersed (looking for something similar to that which she had bought years ago when my grandmother passed away), but was disappointed. What seemed like a lot of money to her, bought her very little.

My brothers put a memorial in the newspaper.  Again, a lot of money.  It is a lovely thought, emotionally, but no one in my family has over $100 to spend on a few lines in the newspaper.  My husband has been investigating more permanent things like a “brick” at the local senior center…definitely on the right track, but we don’t have the money right now…the anniversary of his death comes at a tough time.  The tough lesson of Christmas that we have all had to learn since we were children is to “delay gratification.”  Sometimes we have to plan and wait.

A few weeks ago one of my brothers found a rock on my father’s marker.  We wondered who had left it.  Some research indicated it was someone of the Jewish faith.  Our family is Christian, but to me, it was a touching gesture.  I liked the idea of something more permanent than flowers, and knowing that someone other than family had visited his grave felt very comforting.

At Thanksgiving my nephew told me he had recently gone to the local gym.  It happened to be the same one my father had attended.  When he signed in at the desk, the attendant asked if he was related to my father.  When he answered “yes,” the person proceeded to tell him about my father being such a pleasure and how he cheered her up with his cartoons whenever he would come in to the gym.  It touched him.  This has happened at banks, restaurants, anywhere my father went regularly.

I think the best thing of all is knowing that he made a difference to people outside our family and that he is missed by a lot of people.

Computer Withdrawal

It started with a thin vertical colored line, then another.  It hung at 6 for a little while, then 8.  A few more lines randomly appeared.  I put up with it because there were more important things we needed to spend money on other than fixing my laptop screen.  Also, my husband was planning on fixing it himself to save money.  Suddenly one day, there was a 2-inch wide white line, difficult to read around—the time had come.  Because it was not an opportune time for my husband to fix it, my laptop would have to go to a computer “doctor” and we would be separated. (I’m not one of those people with a fancy cell phone, and I can’t use my computer at work for personal stuff, so this would be a big deal for me.)

We brought it up the street to the aptly named, CPR, where we were told that my model of HP laptop was well-known to burn out its graphics card because of a design flaw; it might require a new “motherboard”— gadzooks!  You mean this wasn’t a one-day fix???  How would I cope?!

A proper diagnosis was necessary before we jumped to conclusions; we left it there and crossed our fingers while discussing worst case scenarios.  The call came within an hour — just the screen (Thank you! Thank you!), but…they didn’t have it in stock.  I was going to be a week without my computer —oh the horror — the withdrawal…

When all was said and done…it wasn’t as bad as I thought.  A week without having to clean up junk mail was actually quite enjoyable.  My world did not stop…although I have gone a long time without posting a blog…:-)

Foodsaver: Money Saver?

We bought our first FoodSaver two years ago.  It worked great. We stocked up our freezer for the winter with meat when it was on sale during the summer months.  We were able to buy family packs of meat, which are cheaper, or a side of beef at the local meat market and have it cut into steaks. I was also able to freeze some vegetables from the garden. We felt like it was a great purchase.  Unfortunately the first one did not even last a year.  It would no longer create a vacuum seal; it just made a lot of noise.

We called the company because it was still under warranty.  Dealing with them required a long phone call, patience and aggressive complaining.  They insisted we had done something wrong or needed to clean the rubber gasket (which can’t have a spec of anything or it cannot create a seal).  We told them we had already tried to clean the gasket (which we had), and it still wouldn’t seal.  They said they would send us a new gasket.  No…we said, it is not the gasket; it needs to be fixed.  They finally agreed to try to repair it but they wanted us to pay the shipping. After more time on the phone and more aggressive complaining they finally agreed to send us a prepaid shipping label to send them the FoodSaver.  It took a while and we had to follow up, but they finally sent us another one.

Now we have had the second one almost a year and are crossing our fingers.  The freezer is full again for the upcoming winter.

I do believe the product is worth purchasing and can save you money.  If you make the bags large enough, you can wash them and reuse them to freeze smaller pieces of food, e.g., use a bag that contained a roast the first time to freeze a steak the second time.  Best of all, no freezer burn!  The food is fresh tasting when you defrost it and cook it (within a year for meat).  Also, we have bought produce at a warehouse club and used the vacuum sealing to keep mushrooms and other produce fresh longer in the refrigerator.

I recommend purchasing one but make sure you send in your warranty card.

The Fall of a Boston Baseball Fan

As I was going through old poems for a chapbook project I am working on, I found this one.  It wasn’t dated, but it was a long time ago: back in the days when Bobby Orr advertised BankBoston (in the drought between Stanley Cups) and before the Patriots new stadium was built (and when the grass was real), in a year when football players were on strike.  Reading it over, though, I thought the sentiment was still relevant.  The end of the Red Sox season was so ugly and all the controversy does not make for an enjoyable hot stove season.

The Fall of a Boston Baseball Fan

One morning

I’m suddenly cold

Without a coat,

And there are

No more

Baseball games.

The season was lost

Long ago,

But I feel it now.

Peak color snuck away,

Dragging with it

Summer’s green grass,

Leaving a brown-tipped

Breed to the football teams

Whose heavy feet

Pound picket lines this year.

The green worn

By our basketball team, in

Dry-heated indoors

Only makes me dream

Of spring air,

And opening day,

Too far away.

Hockey games

Have begun,

But I still miss

Bobby Orr.

His bank commercials

And grey suits

Make me shiver,

Or maybe it’s just

The coming

Of winter.

Orphan Books

I saw this story today and had to share it.

Public bookshelves spread across Germany

I don’t know if we could do this in the United States, but I think it is a great idea.  Something makes me think if we did it here we would end up with pages of the books blowing around the streets.

Most of the charities in the US do not want to take books anymore. I use Paperback Swap for most books I don’t want to keep, but if no one wants them, I often end up keeping them simply because I can’t bear to put them in the trash.

Well…I’m glad homeless books are valued somewhere!